THE TKTV NEWSLETTER
Season 2, Episode 20 aired May 17, 1999

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CONTENTS
1. Intro
2. Letters from the viewing audience
3. Kim's Commercial Comments
4. Don't miss
5. TV Trivia
6. Favorite quotes of the week
7. A totally unrelated link

1. Intro

The snakes are shedding and spring is in the air (which means the hum of the air conditioners outside my window is starting). The only thing funnier than a snake trying to start its shed is perhaps a dog eating peanut butter. Or maybe an ostrich running, but that's something not many people have seen. Imagine that your face and neck are peeling from a really bad sunburn and you have no hands with which to scratch at it. Now imagine having this happen every six weeks.

Okay, okay, so enough about snakes. The big announcement for this week's Newsletter is that Kim is back with her Commercial Comments. Yay! Kim, you've been missed. In honor of Kim, I have a little commercial gripe myself. David Duchovny doing the voice-overs for Sprint is really starting to get on my nerves. There was a particular one during last week's episode of "The X-Files" that threw me for a loop since it came directly after a scene with Fox Mulder, and it was hard to tell where the show ended and commercial began.

Another little TV gripe is for this past week's episode of "Becker." "Becker" stars Ted Danson, who I'm sure everyone remembers from "Cheers." In last Monday's episode, Reggie, the woman who runs the diner that Becker frequents, decided to clean her restaurant from top to bottom. In the process, she found an old issue of TV Guide from the 1980s. She started doing the crossword puzzle, and read one of the questions to Becker. My problem is that the show let a perfectly good opportunity for a Cheers reference fly right by. Instead of her question being, "Action Show. The 'blank' team," it could have easily been "Bartender, 'blank' Malone."

Last but not least, I must recommend a movie to you all. Last Friday I saw "Go," and it's one of the best movies I've seen in a long time. It's a bunch of different intertwining stories that all start in the back-room of a supermarket, and then take place over the next 24 hours. You see the same scene over and over again, but at the end of it you follow a different character out. Each character manages to get themselves embroiled in some incredible adventure, and somehow all the stories converge back together at the end. Not only is it clever, but it's well-written, well-acted, extremely well-directed, and incredibly funny. It also stars some of our favorites from TV, such as Katie Holmes ("Dawson's Creek"), Scott Wolf ("Party of Five") and Jane Krakowski ("Ally McBeal"). I would call it a must-see.

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2. Letters from the viewing audience

From Bren:
I, at the ripe old age of 25, just learned how to program my VCR to tape TV shows at a certain time without the TV having to be on. I learned how to do this last night, and let me tell you, a whole new world has opened up to me. I am no longer captive at my house Monday, Wednesday and Sunday nights to watch Ally, Party of Five, and The X-Files. Jeez, what was I thinking when I wouldn't take the 3 minutes it required for my soon-to-be-roommate to demonstrate this marvelous new skill (already mastered by your average 5-year-old).

About shows, Ally is climbing out of the slump the show started in this season... the past several Allys in a row have been awesome. I personally think Greg needs to be cut loose from the show. He is way too normal and not interesting at all. The show needs a really hot guy to even up the tally of all the hot women on the show.

Note from TK: You'll be glad to hear that Jesse L. Martin (Greg) has accepted a role on "Law & Order" next season, and Antonio Sabato Jr. (Kevin) will have a recurring role on "Ally" next season.
From Chris (regarding "Buffy the Vampire Slayer):
Never really watched it, but the single biggest thing that causes UK audiences to guffaw is that there's a English actor involved, Anthony Head? Well, he used to advertise coffee in a series of adverts, being one half of "The Gold Blend Couple" - I think the concept, if not the adverts themselves, transferred to the States?
From Erin:
Did you watch Joan of Arc last night? A little heavy-handed, but not bad for a miniseries. I must admit that the history major in me had quite a few snide comments like "she has an awfully big vocabulary for an uneducated farm girl," and "wow, everyone's teeth look pretty good for the 15th century." Of course, I sat there until the end, so it couldn't have been too bad.
Letters from the viewing audience are always welcome. Please email any opinions, questions, comments, or random thoughts to TK at tk@tktv.net with the subject of "letters." Letters may be edited for length or content.

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3. Kim's Commercial Comments

Hello again, TV fans. It's great to be back writing for the newsletter after a brief sabbatical. I have managed to read the newsletter each week... so I know what you guys have been talking about. There's been lots of talk about Sportsnight, huh? Let me say that I look forward every week to this half hour. One of the best things about it is its constant movement. I love the way the characters continue to zip through the newsroom or string together assorted pieces of tape while having these huge conversations that will ultimately lead to life-changing decisions. The season finale was tremendous. I hope ABC uses some good judgment here (for once) and leaves this gem alone--no time slot changes, no big moves to Thursday or Saturday night like they've done too many times before.

One more short note before I get to the "meat" of my column. I just read that NBC's "Homicide: Life on the Street" has been cancelled. Even though I suspected it was coming after a season of completely unexplained stories focusing on nothing (and no one for that matter) and the reduction of Kyle Secor's character to nothing more than "the strange-new-age-liberal-bisexual one." What once was a fabulously well-written and award-winning show has seen its better days. I still watch every week, mind you. But it's like an aging ballplayer who once was an all-star... it's time to retire while there's still some dignity left.

What spot has me laughing? Advantage: Singing Pets

Some of you will probably disagree with me on this one. But I love that new Advantage Flea Control spot with the singing cats and dogs. I'm sure this is a direct result of my soft spot for animals of any kind... but so what. The shots change often and go from a couple of adorable Dalmatians to a boxer, then a beagle, then a couple of fluffy white kittens in a basket. Next up is a Jack Russell terrier chasing his tail, then an irresistible assortment of puppies and kittens. Most notable of these is a pair of golden retriever pups and a cat giving a ball of yarn a run for its money. The spot ends on a wide shot of all the animals. But let's not forget the lyrics to the song they're singing... "If you don't use Advantage scratch your ears. If you don't use Advantage scratch your rear. For a month it works with ease. No more ___ for killing fleas. And gentle for a little one like me. Advantage kills fleas really fast. A few drops on the neck will last... Ask my doctor for Advantage for me, please. PLEASE!"

This one is so adorable!!!!! It's worth the wait to download if you haven't seen it yet (or even if you have). Go get it from www.adcritic.com

Honorable mention: Volkwsagon: Mr. Roboto

I just had to throw out an honorable mention to this spot. It's the one with the guy sitting in the middle of a deserted parking lot. He appears to be pantomiming to himself. After a few seconds of strange ticks and jerks, another man walks up out of nowhere and opens the passenger door. Suddenly we hear loud music and the familiar refrain "Thank you very much my Mr. Roboto." The second man joins in the (what we now know is) "dancing." I can't help it. It just makes me laugh. Sometimes it doesn't matter if I can explain why or not. Sometimes things are just funny!

What spot has me cringing? Credit Card Conversations

I hate these new credit card commercials (I'm not even sure which card they're for) that start out with these people who are apparently in the middle of an incredibly serious conversation. One looks like a coach talking to a player, another is a boss firing an employee, and another is a girl breaking up with someone. The next thing we see is the camera cutting away to a shot of a credit card in a chair, or on a bench in the locker room, or on the table at the restaurant. After the announcer chimes in and gives his spill, they return to the original setting for a witty one-liner to wrap up the spot. Ugghhh! I would just like to say to the person who thought up this campaign, (insert sarcasm here -->) "Thank you for assuming that I have the mentality of a two year old and that I would be amused by this!"

TKTV is always looking for new guest writers. Do you have an idea for an article? Write to TK at tk@tktv.net with the subject of "guestwriter."

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4. Don't miss

For details and lots more fun TV to look forward to, see
http://www.tktv.net/index.html?/upcoming.html

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5. TV Trivia

And the first-place award goes to Josie, who sent her correct answer in first: "Wasn't the flower girl Mark Greene's daughter Rachel? I seem to remember her in a big peach dress."

Second prizes go to Allan, Suzanne, Marny (who also named the actress, Yvonne Zima, and all the bridesmaids), Lindsay, Paisley, Chris, Bryan, Laurel and Heather.

Laurel, one of our second-place prize winners, gives us our trivia question for this week. This is the first trivia question submission that I've received that I actually knew the answer to! Laurel writes: "In honor of the fact that season finales have already begun airing and the rest will be coming in the next few shows, what was the most watched season finale ever in the history of television? (Hint: it was also the most watched episode in television history.)"

Send answers to TK at tk@tktv.net with the subject of tvtrivia.

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6. Favorite Quotes of the Week

From "Ally McBeal"
"This isn't about me wanting a man, either, this is about me wanting a partner. Okay? A partner to go through life with. And since I happen to be heterosexual, that limits the field to men, at least if I want to have sex, and I do. I like sex. And if that makes me weak, tough, then I wanna be weak. I want a partner. I want sex. I want a house, with furniture. I want to have a baby. I want to have all of it. I want to get fat. I want to wear maternity dresses. I want to stick my legs up in stirrups, take two shots of Petosin and spit a little thing right out between my thighs and then have him suck on my breast with daddy standing right there the whole time pointing the camcorder. Okay? That is what I want." -Ally

From "Spin City"
"Mike, you gotta be honest with James." -Carter
"'You gotta be honest with James. You gotta be honest with the mayor. You gotta be honest with Nikki....' Why are you even IN politics?" -Mike

From "Millennium"
"The honorable Anthony Bailey, judge of the superior court, in and for Stanton County, has ordered that on May 14th, 1999, Mr. Edward Sebastien Cuffle shall suffer the penalty of death within the walls of Stanton County Corrections Institute for the crime of murder in the first degree. Mr. Cuffle, do you have any last words?" -Warden
"I do. Use sunscreen." -Mr. Cupple

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7. A totally unrelated link

It'll take you back to your childhood

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Good leaders being scarce, following yourself is allowed.